A Lesson in A-S-S

5 Oct

She asked and I told her – over and over and over again. It felt like I said the word ass more during that ten minutes talking to Nia in the car than I’ve said in the past seven years.

It all began when she asked to listen to Pink’s song “Get the Party Started.” Her dancing class plays and she wanted to continue rocking out to it after class. The difference is, the version her dance class uses is probably G-Rated. The version I played had the lyrics: “I’ll be burnin’ rubber, you’ll be kissin’ my ass.”

Nia: What does that word mean, momma?
Me: Um, well, it can mean a few things. Some say it as another word for donkey to mean silly or stupid. They say jackass instead of donkey. Like, that person is a jackass. But that’s not nice and we shouldn’t say it. It’s also used as a not nice way to say bottom or butt. (Clear my throat.) Ass. We also shouldn’t say that.
Nia: How do you spell it?
Me: Why?
Nia: Just ’cause I wanna know.
Me: Well, you spell it a-s-s but you don’t need to spell it or write it or say it. Ok?
Nia: Ok, but can I tell my friends I know what it means?
Me: No! I mean, no, because they might not know what it means and their moms and dads won’t want them to know yet. You let their moms and dads tell them like I told you. You shouldn’t say the word because it’s not nice and you’ll get in big trouble if you say it. Your school will probably call mommy and daddy at work and you wouldn’t want that, right? I’m telling you what it means because I’m teaching you so you know and know not to say it. Ok?
Nia: Ok. How do you spell it again?
Me: Nope. I think we should be all finished talking about it because I said it way to many times just now and we should just be finished.

And deep breath. Did I do the right thing? I have no idea. I suppose I could have just said, “You don’t need to worry about it or say it and that’s all you need to know” but I want to be able to talk with the kids and not hide things from them. I also really appreciate that they come to us with questions and I hope it stays that way – pain in the ass or not.

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4 Responses to “A Lesson in A-S-S”

  1. betsy October 5, 2010 at 8:30 pm #

    I’m Team Disclosure. I found out about the birds & bees at around age 6 after I asked my psychology major father why John Cougar was singing about Jack putting his hands between Diane’s knees. He could have gone a million directions with that, but no. It ended up being a penis and vagina discussion! Go Dad!

  2. Diana Rafiani October 5, 2010 at 9:50 pm #

    It’s 9:45 at night and I’m laughing my ass off reading your blog. Good job Mommy. Love You…

    • nikkival October 7, 2010 at 8:43 am #

      Mom, that is hilarious! Love you.

  3. Joe October 7, 2010 at 8:41 am #

    I laughed so hard reading about this. Nicole you are an excellent mommy. I have a memory of calling my brother an ass when I was about 10 or 11 and my mother being so angry…and then laughing behind my back!

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