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Unusual Feeling

30 Jan

Today, I experienced probably one of the most unusual, disturbing feelings during my morning breakfast.

I was eating some cereal – Special K to be exact – and was about half way finished when I’m not sure what happened – but the bowl tipped over and landed squaw in my lady area.  Now, you may think well you say you were half finished so there couldn’t have been that much in the bowl – well see, I’m a BIG eater so I use a BIG bowl so it was almost like it was a small full bowl.

I wasn’t quite sure what to do when it happened – I sat there for way too long trying to figure out – should I try to gather up all that soggy cereal and put it back in the bowl or should I try to get off the counter height stool I was sitting in without standing up all the way (pretty impossible being that my feet don’t touch the ground when I’m sitting).  Well, instead of those choices I decided to take my pants off and gather them in a ball so I wouldn’t make an even bigger mess.  As if having all that yuck spilled on me wasn’t bad enough – now I undressed at the breakfast table! Nia and Nate both looking at me like “why’s mom stripping?”

BLAH – that’s all I have to say is BLAH.  Nia, being the sweetie she is, made it all better though by saying, “that’s ok Momma – you can clean it.”  Thanks kiddo.

Man of a few words

23 Jan

He does not speak but yet he still finds a way to talk back to his mother. How in the world I’m I ever supposed to scold this little angry man when he is so hilariously adorable?!?!

Today, I caught him eating a cardboard block.

Block Buffet

When I saw him chewing it I gasped and said “NO SIR!”

He laughed.

That obviously didn’t get through to him so I lowered my eyebrows and pointed at him (like this was going to be less funny) “NO SIR! NO EATING BLOCKS!”

He pointed at me and said “SHA!”

I held my hand open so he would bring me the block.  (Can you believe he did?!?!)  I pointed at the part now missing color and said again, “No eating blocks! YUCK!”

Nate's Snack

He again pointed at me and said “SHA!”

This continued for some time – I think I just wanted to see how many times he would keep pointing and “SHA”ing.  It was so funny.  At one point I hid my face behind Nia because I couldn’t keep from laughing.  He was so serious and so determined to tell me how he was feeling,  Even when I hid the block behind my back he squatted down to try to see it and again pointed at it and said “SHA!”

I guess he told me, huh?

Block Eater

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But I Don’t Wanna Play Princesses!

22 Jan

From the sound of the title you might think I’m going to write about Nia throwing a fit but nope – that is my whine and the guilt of feeling this way is eating me alive.

It’s just , from where I look at it, I play PLENTY of princesses during the day.  If you put a time limit on it, I would say I  sit down and enter princess world for like 10 minutes of every hour.  In fact, I just had to put a ponytail in Ariel’s hair.  I know, it sounds awful – I mean all Nia wants to do is play with me and I love to play with her – I just want to play something other than princesses!

Sometimes I can’t believe this is what I complain about now.  I used to complain about reporters going over their allotted time for a story or about others who didn’t want to do their story.  Now I find myself acting like a 3-year-old when I’m asked to play princess. I’ve actually BEGGED Nia to play something else.  “Please can we play blocks or color or how about we read a book?” I haven’t resorted to the really tempting stuff yet like eating cookies or drawing on walls.  Honestly, I don’t think those will work either.

I guess it’s my own fault.  I’m the one who kept letting her watch all those princess movies and I’m the one who sang all the songs to her over and over again.  I just feel so bad for feeling this way.  I know she’s going through a big change now – she used to have kids to play with everyday – now it’s just mom and her little brother who destroys her toys at playtime.  It’s actually kind of funny, especially when it happens while we’re playing princesses – I pretend Nate is a monster and everyone must run for their lives to get out before the castle is tossed on the floor.  Nia thinks it’s hilarious – we all do – but I can see how that could become very frustrating to a little girl who is serious about her princess playing.

Princess Player

By the way, so far during this blog entry not only have I had to fix Ariel’s hair but I also had to change her clothes and tell Nia how beautiful she looks.  I think it’s so awesome how Nia can play pretend by herself – she’ll sit there and make Ariel and Snow White go shopping or have dinner – she makes Ariel’s mom sit at a little computer and “pay bills” and Ariel’s daddy is usually taking a nap and there’s always a little brother around. When I was little I loved playing pretend with Barbies – now I’m so terrible at it.

I know this time will pass and then I will be sad because she won’t want me to play with her anymore – she might not even want me to talk to her.  I know I should cherish this time and make the most of it – I am trying – I just hope we can break into another playtime phase sooner than later!

Loves Her Princesses

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That was awkward

22 Jan

Kids say the darndest things right?  Wasn’t that a TV show or something?  Well, it’s pretty funny to hear, even when your kid is the one being brutally honest to strangers.  Some recent awkward moments include:

– After STARRING at a teen boy with pierced ears standing next to us in line at the grocery store, Nia seems to yell, “boys aren’t supposed to wear earrings!”   What am I supposed to say to that? He obviously heard her and doesn’t think it was very funny – he must be thinking what kind of narrow-minded parent are you to teach your child that only girls can were earrings!  Well, it’s hard trying to explain the complexities of life and the freedom of choice to a 3-year-old!  I mean, I want to tell her – trust all police officers, they will help you when you need it – but then the realistic side of me wants to add – but even then some people will only pretend to be police officers to fool you and steal you away from mommy and daddy!  I think she’s smart and all but that would really blow her mind.  I told her (very loudly so the boy would hear) “that’s not true, your uncles have earrings.”  Not sure if that really helped the situation, but I had to try something!

  • The next awkward moment happened at the same grocery store on the same day.  The nice older gentleman was helping us take our groceries to the car – he was even loading them up in the trunk for us.  Well, I was trying to make small talk with him but he was really hard to understand because he had such a strong accent.  I would just do the thing most people do – smile and say uh-huh – Nia though – doesn’t yet grasp the concept of politeness and says not once but twice “he talks silly huh?”  All I could think to say is “honey that’s not nice, he’s a nice man.”  Her response?  “But he does TALK SILLY!”
  • I’ve saved the worst for last – it’s the worst because it happened in church – as I was taking communion (or the Jesus cookie as Nia would call it).  I was carrying Nia and it was my turn to quietly take the “body of Christ” from the well-dressed, short man at the altar.  As soon as the wafer entered my mouth Nia says, “He’s little huh momma?” All I could do was look the man in the eye and try to apologize with my facial expression.
  • I’m now trying to teach Nia about why it’s not nice to say certain things to people – yes it makes for very memorable, awkward moments – but I just would hate for her to shout out something really horrible.  Like when she points at the people who drive those carts with the baskets on them and says “look momma they have a funny buggy.”

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More Nia Quotes,

18 Jan

“I’ll be right back Momma.  You take care of the baby (Nate) ok?”

“That was so cute, huh, Momma?” (Said right after the previous statement.)

“You are my best friend.”

“Shake your booty.” (Said while bending over and looking in department store mirrors.)

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Can’t Relax

18 Jan

Nate has a fever tonight and it is totally stressing me out because not only do I worry ANY time the kids even feel slightly warm to me (which I say so much Nia actually says she feels “warm to me” when I ask her how she feels) but tonight I am the only parent in town.  Andrew is back in Savannah for work which means IF I should have to take Nate to the hospital I will have to wake up the princess and take her to the germ-infested area as well.  I know I might not have to take him there – I’m just preparing myself mentally so it won’t be such a freak-out session when it happens.

I guess I’m so paranoid about stuff like this because Nia had a febrile seizure when she was about his age and it was the most scary experience I ever went through so I immediately think about that any time the thermometer is higher than 102.  They are just so helpless and innocent and they take up my whole heart – when their health is threatened – mine is too.

I know, I know – it’s just a fever – I mean there are much worse things – I just can’t help it.  I won’t be able to relax until I know he is back in the normal temperature range and his daddy is back home.

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The Screamer

17 Jan

Some of you know the story of “The Screamer” but for you others, let this be a warning.

He will fool you with his irresistible cuteness and happiness – seeming to be at peace with all that surrounds him. Then, out of nowhere, he releases an ear-piercing, breathtaking, heart-stopping scream.  It’s a sound you’d never imagine would come from such a small creature and one you never want to hear again.  What’s even more troubling is the enjoyment he gets after letting it out.

I haven’t been able to get the deafening noise recorded yet – I’m afraid it will damage my equipment.  I’ve told myself to be brave though – I need to preserve it so he will know how he made people at church/the store/on the phone gasp and ask “what in the hell was that?!?!”  All I can say is, “that’s just our screamer.”

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Obsess Much?

17 Jan

Is it bad to make your child to go to sleep just so you can start watching a horribly brainless/addictive television show?  She kept saying, “but I’m not tired Momma” and I acted like I didn’t even hear it, “ok, night-night now. I love you. See you tomorrow.”  I then closed the door, ran to the kitchen, grabbed the Chinese food we ordered just for this special night, got situated downstairs and hit play.

I’m not just like this with “American Idol.”  I just really love television and movies.  I haven’t been falling asleep until like 5 in the morning because I’m just going from channel to channel.  It gets really bad when the music channels actually play music videos (around 4 am – 6 am) because then I just flip back and forth between them so I can see all the videos.  Andrew things I’m crazy but I just can’t fall asleep – I think it’s because it’s the only time I have to do what I love to do.

I guess there are worse things to enjoy.  I just have to chill out on rushing the kids to bed – I mean we were even recording it!   For the next t.v. show premiere, I’ll at least give Nia the chance to get in her bed before I turn the lights out and shut the door.  (I’m totally kidding, mom!)

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Angry Mother Sucker

13 Jan

Nate cannot just suck his thumb to soothe himself.  Along with the thumb, he has to make a noise that sounds very disgruntled.  He most often does it while he’s sleeping. The girls at his old day care said it sounded like a motorboat.  Andrew calls him the “Angry Mother Sucker” and it is so fitting.  It’s like he’s angry even in his sleep.

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Silly Things I Say During the Day

10 Jan

They are only silly because they so very pointless to say – like a 3 year old and 1 year old are really going to listen/understand.

“Don’t make a big mess.” (Said right before they manage to tear apart 3 rooms – with toys/objects spread throughout the house.)

“Try the food mommy cooked for you, you might like it.” (Usually said when I cook something like stew.)

“Nate, don’t give all your food to the doggy!” (Meanwhile, the dog is in heaven and the boy is smiling.)

“Stop pushing your brother down on the floor.” (Said as Nia is chasing him around the house – both are laughing hysterically.)

“Can we please stop screaming?” (Usually said right after the previous silly statement.)

“It’s night-night/nap time.” (Right after this one Nia begins to freak out about how she is not tired and doesn’t want to go to sleep.)

“Do you want mommy to lose her mind?” (This one comes after a really trying day.)

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