Release

12 Apr

With only four commutes to Atlanta to go, a Rooms To Go truck got the best of me today.

If you know my driving history, it may be tough to believe I have maintained a relatively courteous and calm commute style – avoiding tailing others (when possible), allowing others (who properly use their blinkers) to merge in front of me and, unbelievably, not losing my temper at every jerkface driver I encounter. I actually adopted the reaction of smile and wave, but the shame-on-you mom head shake is another option that I enjoy and use frequently. (Also, giving a thumbs up while mouthing the words “You got real far, didn’t you?” as I pull beside someone at a red light who cut off a line of cars a few seconds earlier. For my added pleasure, I’ll throw in a hand clap of rub-it-in for them.)

But today, just two days before I break up with multiple bumper-to-bumper lanes of traff*ck, a Rooms To Go truck squeezed itself nearly on top of my Maxx to get in my, also not-moving, lane.

Well, my fierce middle finger couldn’t be controlled. It fired – and fired and fired. The truck’s driver saw it fire as I evasively merged in the other not-moving lane.

The driver must have thought he didn’t deserve such an ugly reaction so he began to honk at me. He kept pulling up beside my passenger side window and honking.

I never looked over. I did fire another middle digit at him – and a head shake. (Had to throw that one in.)

That’s when the next response happened. I sobbed. Uncontrollably. I sobbed for a good two miles which translates to 10 minutes for Atlanta traffic.

I was a mess but then I felt so much better after the tears stopped. In fact, I wanted to catch up to the driver and give him the signature, “I’m sorry” wave, complete with the “whoopsies” facial expression. (Didn’t happen.)

I guess I just needed the release. So, thanks for that Rooms To Go truck driver. However, I hope I don’t see you during my last three commutes.

Inquisitive Kid Interrogation

7 Apr

It was a night-night routine like any other: tuck under the blankets, prayers, start her instrumental music CD, talk about happy things for her to think about to keep bad dreams away and, of course, hugs-n-kisses. Then, Nia started firing the questions at me:

“Is the Easter Bunny just a mascot?”

“Um, I’m not sure.”

“Are you really the one who hides the eggs?

“What do you want to believe?”

“That you sleep and the Easter Bunny comes then. But is it you? Tell the truth.”

I totally fail at a response and lean over to hug her and hide my horrible poker-player face. Then, successfully (terribly) change subject.

The questions are flying and I have zero clue how to answer them. I really struggle with all the magical people in my children’s lives and discussing things I don’t even fully understand. Not just about the bunny or Santa either. More so about God.

Nia wants to know: “Was God born? How was God just there? He had to come from somewhere.”

I don’t know how to respond. All I can say is I believe He was just there. He was first. I want to believe that. I will try to give Bean what she wants for as long as I can, too.

I feel the spirit of all of it is rooted in positivity and is meant for good. I get that feeling from my belief in God. I hope she will understand the intention was never to deceive and hurt. I’m also hoping I’ll know the right time to discuss it with her. The night before Easter just didn’t feel right. Or maybe it was perfect…a confession of sorts.

Where is that basket so I can candy myself into a sugar haze and forget this until she brings it up again? Maybe then will be the right time.

Buddies, Baseball and Bulldogs

2 Apr

Bulldog Baseball Fans

We met through a love of baseball – cheering on our three boys and their t-ball team. Now, a season or so later, I’m happy we were all able to get together again – this time to cheer on the Bulldog baseball team.

Georgia didn’t win but we all had a great time in the stands and watching all of our kids run the bases (twice) after the game. (Andrew may or may not have timed Nate. He was trying so hard to pass a much taller kid in front of him and was pretty McSpeedy. The girls did great in their flip-flops and fashion wear.)

Our boys aren’t on the same t-ball team this season (in fact, we have to play against each other in a few weeks!) but I have a feeling they will be rooting for each other from across the field. All three of them love the sport so purely and intently. They watched the entire game, wearing their gloves and talking stats.

Baseball buds.

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The Next Adventure

31 Mar

You’re crazy. It will never happen.

That’s what I would’ve said if you told me I’d be driving 45 miles in two to six lanes of thick traffic twice a day to work on a website and understand HTML code.

I did it though. For four and a half years. Sometimes, my ride to work would take 90 minutes. Sometimes, my ride home would cost me the same time from that same day. Three hours, gone.

Lovely Atlanta Traffic

The job I was driving to and from was great. I loved it. It challenged me to try something different and I was proud to work for such a worthwhile organization – Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta. Even more, I worked with a wonderful team of people. I learned so much from them and I formed friendships I cherish. I also had an incredible manager. I have much respect for him and how he knows his area and helps others to understand. The team he leads is awesome – both in work ethic and talent – and I feel so special to have been a part of it. I will miss our lunches, “face time” at our cubes and meetings that often took a turn toward laughs and tangent conversations. (It was all a part of our creative process.)

Some of the Beloved Team

I am sad to leave but another opportunity closer to home is now in my future.

The job posting said Web Content Editor, Athens Regional Medical Center. Athens is just 25 miles away. A 30-minute drive. That title is my title at Children’s. I needed to try for it.

It only took about 30 minutes to apply online. I then went about my daily routine and checked on the status of the application just about every day. The day I didn’t, a few weeks after, I got the call that they wanted to interview me.

I felt good after the interview. I graded myself a B+ but I’m pretty hard on myself. My potential new boss was welcoming and nice. She described the position and I felt like it was perfect for me. It would be a lot more writing for me but other than that the position is what I’ve been doing – only much closer to home.

The second round of interviewing involved a project. I had to do an online campaign proposal that included rewriting and restructuring a web section. I turned it in feeling good about my ideas but nervous about how I formated the actual proposal.

I waited.

The call came. They wanted me. I cried, overflowing with mixed emotions and apprehension about leaving a place and people I love so much.

My last day – Friday the 13.

I will have Spring Break off with the kids and then I begin my new adventure. I’m excited about using my experience to help another not-for-profit hospital and know this distance is better for our family. I’m looking forward to my first day there but teary-eyed for my last. I will always hold the memories I made at Childrens’s dear to my heart – especially those laughs (there were a lot).

Loved This So

I have a full heart. Grateful for all I learned and the people I met (and will stay connected to) at Children’s. Grateful for the chance for a new challenge with another great organization.

Adventure awaits. (Just not the bumper-to-bumper kind.)

Dear Sister Note about the Play that Wasn’t

27 Mar

The play was for Literacy Day. Nate’s class had been learning songs about vowel sounds, rhyming words and speckle frogs for weeks. He sang in the shower and at the breakfast table to Nia, rehearsing – complete with finger snaps and an air guitar. He excitedly asked if we could watch him sing. The night before the big day finally arrived. He fell asleep singing, knowing I was going to be in the audience to see him shine with the other Kindergartens. Then, hours later, he woke up with a terrible coughing fit.

Sadly, he would miss his play – too tired from a rough night and too sick to sing on stage. He sang for me at the doctor’s office (white-wall video at the bottom of this post) and wrote Nia a note:

Signed: Sweet, Sicky Boy

Translated: “Nia, sorry I cannot come to school today because I am sick. I can do another play next year. Don’t worry, Nia. I have a bad cough. One thing why I can’t come. Two, I have a cold.”

He later added, “I hope I don’t have it anymore and I wish you don’t have it like me.”

Sweet, sicky boy. I’m glad you are feeling better now.

Proud Music Moments

23 Mar

Driving a scenic route, windows down, wind flooding in as music pours out from the car. My dad sings and drums the steering wheel, enjoying every beat, riff and word. With a hand-surfing the air, I absorb the sights passing by us – trying to focus on the branches of trees.

His music is different from mine. I am a kid, listening to Top 40 hits and the boy band of my dreams. He is an adult, listening to music with meaning created by celebrated and respected artists.

I listened during those drives through. I heard the difference and took note.

The Beatles. Bob Dylan. Fleetwood Mac. Rush. Peter Gabriel. Genesis. Steve Winwood. Kate Bush. Tori Amos. The Traveling Wilburys.

Because of my dad, I learned how to appreciate music more. Really listen to it. He loves music and wanted to share his favorites. It made him so happy. I thank him for opening my ears and heart to it. I love that I’m able to know songs that others are surprised I know.

I hope to pass on the respect for other music to the kids, too. I put some Beach Boys, Elvis and early Madonna on Nia’s MP3 and it’s already paying off. She was recently able to recognize Elvis and the Beach Boys among a restaurant’s playlist.

Took me right back to young, hand-surfing, me.

The Year of the Brew and the Bod

22 Mar

Andrew turned 35 with well wishes and gifts of love from friends and family.

One of those gifts was named Mr. Beer and it created a one-man home brewery.

Mr. Beer home brewing

Bottle Night

He brewed and he brewed, bottled and emptied, unlabeled and labeled and started a schedule.

The main fridge filled up with future beers and a new one was needed to chill the ale.

Drew's Brew home brew

A fridge full of Drew's Brews.

Drew’s Brews started as a beloved (and delicious) hobby but it soon became a passion.

One year. His 35th. He tried something new and conquered it – achieving pour after pour satisfaction.

Great brew.

The 3-5 also meant a time to run – get in shape and race toward a healthier him.

And it didn’t stop there, his running became a family inspiration.

Daddy and Son Sneaks

In 5K after 5K, some 10K’s and a half marathon too, Andrew placed in his age group and met his goals.

Personal best 10K run.

The running lifted his spirits to be more in shape – and it also lightened his load.

From 180 to 150.

Thirty pounds lost to start his 36th year, with a family who loves him and supports him with cheer.

Daddy's Biggest Fans

Happy birthday, Andrew. May this new year bring you all the joys of the last – with a personal best race times and a full glass.

Awesome "Trophy"

Bye-bye Barbie Bike, Hello Tiptoe Tall Ride

18 Mar

Of course, the time was going to come. Signs were all around me every day (and continue to be).

The questions they ask. The things they know. The inches they grow, marked with higher and higher marks on the wall. The ability to wash their hands at the kitchen sink or brush their teeth at the bathroom sink without a stool. Child car seats with only seat belts and not five-point harnesses. Bigger bicycles.

For some sentimental reason, that last one recently did me in. As I watched them push and ride their first two-wheel bikes to trade them in for bigger ones at the store, I couldn’t hold back the tears.

Bye-bye, First Bikes

Nia’s first bike was a rad Barbie one that had a place for Barbie to ride her bike, too.

Bean's First Bike - 2008

Nate’s was Spiderman all the way.

Nate's First Bike - 2009

As we steered the two pieces of childhood memories to customer service, I started to doubt our decision. “We could keep them and the new ones.” I tried to reason with Andrew. “That way, smaller cousins and friends will have bikes to ride when they visit.” We don’t have the physical space for a shopping aisle of bikes in our garage. The decision stood.

Aside from being sad about saying goodbye to that time of growing up, I think I just didn’t like the thought of their childhood memories being recycled in a heap of scrap metal, instead of recycled and cherished by another child.

The kids didn’t think twice about it the exchange though. They parked their old rides and immediately turned their backs and bee-lined for the new spokes.

Their smiles helped me shake off the sadness. Especially when we got home and I watched as Nia worked with her daddy to build her bigger bike and then looked so not-little while she pedaled around the cul-de-sac.

Growing up is good. Sniff.

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Fridge of Fortune

10 Mar

It’s a refrigerator like many, I’m sure. A puzzle of pieces covering whatever steel they can cling to. There are notes to remember, cherished family photos, and magnets adorned with sweet sayings or places we’ve been (and even a few free ones that we felt were worthy enough to make the metal or may need some day). Nestled among all of that past and present is something we’ve been building over many years. Our fortunes, linked together with tape.

We don’t keep just any cookie fortune that comes our way though because many are not even fortunes at all. (“You are well liked and have many friends” really doesn’t tell me a fortune, although it’s a nice thing to read.) We love to keep the ones we want most to come true, we know are coming true (Andrew got the “step on the soil” one before his first deployment overseas to Kosovo) or, in the case of the hen one, mark a milestone: our first born’s first fortune.

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Fortunes Buried in Magnets

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Fridge Wall of Fortune

Not sure when we will live out some of these fortunes but, for now, I’m happy to just to believe they may be out there. If not, at least the cookie was tasty and our fridge puzzle will stay intact.

 

Once Upon a Bathtime

8 Mar

I love how I found the array of characters hanging out in the tub after Nia’s bath.

“The superheroes are trying to help the girls not fall in the pool and get their dresses wet.”

What about Batman over there with Cinderella?

“They are dating.”

Not sure I would pair them together but maybe Nia sees something I don’t …

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Array of Characters

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I give it two weeks.

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Spidey and Ariel are my favorites.

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