“Now, there are just some things you get at the Wal-Mart.”
– Advice a mother gave her preteen daughter tonight while shopping at Publix.
Serving Time
18 NovBefore it was even noon today, we’d already put Nate in time out five times for hitting or pushing Nia. It’s been so ridiculous and so frustrating and frankly, I’m really sad and exhausted over it all. He even pushed a little girl (like 15 months or so) at the mall’s soft play area yesterday! As soon as we saw it we jumped up, grabbed him, told him “NO SIR! No pushing!” and didn’t let him play anymore. Before we left, he went over to her, hugged her and said “Orry” but none of that really matters to me if he keeps pushing and hitting.
I’ve read that all of this is a “normal/typical” toddler stage and I’ve read time out is the way to go – I just hope and pray it works. It’s funny because some of the advice on the online websites I’ve visited say things like, “children under 2 should not watch tv.” Well, that’s great. How do I undo that? Besides, Nia watched plenty of tv before she was 2 and she never hit/pushed/bit anyone plus, she’s super smart so I can’t say that tv is to blame for his actions. It’s not like he’s watching Ultimate Cage Fighting (well at least not more than 30 minutes a day – I’m totally kidding if you don’t know that). I mean, his cartoons are Curious George and Go Diego Go – all those are teaching him to do is speak like a monkey, make messes and want to wear a “Rescue Pack”. (He really does all of those things.)
All of this has me feeling a little timid about taking him back to the Y this week. I know I can’t live my life like that but I just don’t want to chance us getting the boot. I even thought about telling the ladies to get me as soon as he does anything that way it will be even more of a punishment and he doesn’t get written up. I can’t believe how stressed out all of this is making me. Hopefully, he will grow out of it (like all the websites say he will). In the meantime though, I have a feeling he’s going to be spending a lot of time behind bars.
Criminal Record before Age 2
16 NovToday, Nate got “written up” while being watched at the YMCA and I don’t blame those ladies one bit! He is just so rough! Everyone says, “He’s just a boy” but I’m so tired of hearing that excuse. I know that there are some little boys who would never even think about pushing a 15-month-old little girl down one time let alone THREE!
The ladies who watch the kids at the Y are so nice and the one who wrote him up gave him 2 chances before even putting him time out. Apparently, every time they put a child in time out they have to write it up and after three write-ups they basically boot the kid out of child watch. I would be so super bummed if that happens. I love being able to go there – not only for me but also for the crazy little man. He really loves to play there. In fact, every morning after we drop Nia off at school Nate says, “I play?” He gets all mad at me when I tell him “Not today sweetie.” We both enjoy spending a few hours a week at the Y and it would be such a shame if we lose the luxury because he plays too rough.
I know he was just playing and that he didn’t push the little girl down in a mean way because he and Nia constantly wrestle and shove each other, laughing the whole time. Andrew and I are working on breaking him of the rough-housing but it’s really hard to punish him every time he runs at Nia and they both scream and laugh. He even told the little girl “Orry” but I don’t think he even understands what that really means.
I just never thought I would be that mother. The mother of the bully. The mother of the victim was so nice about it. She was in there as I went to pick him up and she was telling me that her oldest was a biter and that I shouldn’t feel so bad about it because lots of kids go through the “rough” stage. I’m not sure if she knew that Nate was taking his “rough stage” out on her daughter – I’m sure I would have got a much different response. If she did know maybe she was so nice because she saw that I genuinely felt bad about the whole thing. Now, we just have to get the boy to understand that he needs to chill – but after all, “he is a boy” right?
“I’m Tougher than You Dad!”
Nate and Seek
16 NovHe hides his eyes and counts (“fa, fov, fa, fov”).
He takes off running in search of his big sister.
He’s nowhere close to finding her but then she makes a noise to help him. (Such a good big sis.)
He goes running toward the noise and screams “Air e is!”
It’s now his turn to hide.
He immediately “hides” right where Nia was hiding – the whole time wearing a huge smile on his face.
Nia counts and says “Ready or not, here I come!”
Nate runs out of where he was “hiding” and yells “Air e is!”
Never Too Old for Slumber Parties
16 NovIt’s funny because if we still lived in Savannah, I would be able to enjoy the company of good friends whenever I wanted. I would be able to call them up on any random day and say “let’s meet up for dinner.” I would be able to spend any weekend afternoon at the park with them or brave the mall with babies in tow. As much as I would love to be able to do those things, one thing living several hours away has done is require SLEEP OVERS!
I have always loved having friends stay over my house. My mom spoiled me by letting me have anywhere from 5 to 12 pre-teen/teen girls keep her awake with our giggles and screams and New Kids on the Block song renditions (choreographed dances included). Now that I’m older, the sleep overs have changed – we sure don’t stay up very late (1 am was insane!), we are now legally allowed to drink as much alcohol as we dare to, our conversations are about kids and money instead of which boy is cute and clothes/hair/weight – oh wait I’m wrong about that last one – weight is still a topic – but anyway – some things never change – like the comfort and security and sanity that good friends provide.
I loved getting to spend so much time with Ginger, Lee and Cami last weekend. We didn’t even have to do anything and it was fun. Watching the kids play – fun. Sitting on the couch and chillin’ (often with laptops) – fun. Heading out to Winder’s Fall Festival without knowing if it would be lame or not – fun (actually lots of fun). It was just so awesome getting my “friend fix” for 4 days straight and being able to celebrate Ginger’s birthday with her. I can only hope that we always try to do our best to share as many special events as we can together. After all, Ginger was part of one of the most special events in my life (Nia’s birth) and it just feels so natural to have our families grow up together. (And maybe even be able to watch our girls share more sleep overs!)
So Comfy
From a Kid’s Eye View…
6 Nov- Everything is “included” when it comes to toys –
Nia will watch a commercial featuring some toy horses and a stable and she won’t notice how cute the animals are or all the neat things that come with the stable – she’ll notice the green outdoor carpet underneath it all and exclaim, “Look Momma! It comes with grass!” - Toys are much better in commercials than they are in real life –
Sometimes the commercial will use animation to help portray that something gives off a scent – Nia will see that and say, “Momma, the strawberries fly out of their bellies!” Oh and the new thing that gets me is these commercials featuring these well-kept little girls in their perfect princess outfits playing with an unbroken kitchen set – in real life those princess dresses would be torn in places and the girls would have like brownie on their face with milk mustaches and the kitchen would be missing some essential cooking utensils plus the oven door would be hanging off – I mean come on! I want to see some true to life kid toy commercials! The carpet needs to be dirty and the kitchen set needs to have some crayon on it! To make it even more real – throw in a little brother who’s trying to sit in the refrigerator and totally ruining the cookies his big sis is trying to bake! - You really mean what you say –
The first time I told Nia, “momma’s just gonna go jump in the shower real quick” she replied “can I come see you jump in? are you going to jump like this?” (acting out a jump) - Yesterday is today and tomorrow is yesterday –
It is so freakin’ hard to teach this concept! I even tried writing it down but what good will that do? Kid can’t read yet! Andrew’s mom says to tell her we’ll be doing something in so many “sleeps.” Like, “In 3 more sleeps (night-nights) and we’ll be going to the zoo!” - Hopping forward with one leg in haphazardly front of the other IS skipping –
Yet another really hard thing to teach. - You don’t need to look forward to drive a car –
I cannot even tell you how many times Nia will say, “Momma, look” while I’m trying to drive. I tell her that I can’t turn around while I’m driving and that if I do I will boo-boo the car. As soon as I am stopped at a red light though, she tells me that now I can look at her because I’m not driving anymore. Too smart for me.
How Could I Forget This?!?!
4 NovNate went pee-pee on the potty! Isn’t that crazy? He can’t even say potty! We just tried it out of the blue and he did it! Now, we make it a routine thing every night before bath time. We aren’t really trying to “train” him yet but we figured it wouldn’t hurt to at least get him used to the idea. We’ll see!
Growing Up
4 Nov
Yesterday we drove to Savannah to celebrate Baby Ella’s birthday. I cannot believe she is 2! Our other little niece is also growing up too quickly! Gabbie-Goose (as Andrew loves to call her) will be 3 in just a few weeks!
I wish we could be there to celebrate with Gabbie but we’re just too far away to make the trek. Going to Savannah for Ella’s still meant we had to brave the Angry-Man-Who-Gets-Really-Peeved-on-Road-Trips (aka Nate) but we knew it wouldn’t be as rough on him (then us) because it’s a much shorter drive. It was so worth the little bit of anger Nate did scream at us though because Ella was very happy to have Nia there and I know Nia and Nate both had a blast!
It’s so hard having to watch the kids grow up from afar. I wish I could be there for them and their mommies and daddies to help them get things ready for parties, to babysit, to watch movies, to play, to hug…WHATEVER! For now though, I look forward to the special times we get to share and the happy memories we make while we’re together.
LOVE YOU FAMILY!
A Sample of the Insanity
1 NovHere are just a few examples of the listening pleasures I get to be treated to each day – courtesy of the kids.
Nia: “Nate, look at me. Nate, look at me. Nate, look at me. Nate, look at me. Nate, look at me. Nate, look at me. Naaatttee, looook at meeeee. Nate, look at me Nate. NAAATTTEEE, look at me!”
Nate: “NO!”
Me: “NIA! That’s enough! Obviously, he does not want to look at you right now!”
Nia: “Why?”
Nia: “Momma, if you have green and yellow and green and yellow and green and yellow and green and yellow and green and yellow and blue and green and yellow and green and yellow and green and yellow and green and yellow and green and yellow – does that make a pattern?”
Me: Too exhausted and confused to give a clear answer. (I was trying to cook dinner at the same time.) It came out something like “Huh? Uh-huh.” I mean, I would really have to see that one written down on paper to know for sure if it made a pattern. There was no way I was counting up how many green and yellows she said before and after the blue!
Nate: “NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!”
Me: My reply to this is either – “Whatever dude.” “I don’t want to hear it.” or “mumble, mumble, mumble, tell me no, mumble, mumble, mumble.”
Nia: “Momma, I’m going to tell you a story. There was a frog and a balloon and a bug and the bug wanted to eat the balloon and the frog was going to the store and the balloon was at the store and the bug wanted to eat it and the frog got it and then a lion came in and said ‘roar’ and the balloon cried because it was scared and the bug felt bad for the balloon and didn’t want to eat it anymore but the lion did so he said “roar, I’m going to eat you up” and he did.”
Me: I would give a few “oh yeahs?” and “wows” throughout the story a “why did he do that” on occasion. One time she told a story during the ENTIRE time we were at the grocery store. That was like a 30 minute story or something. It was so hard to try to listen to her and make sure I got everything on the list! (By the way, the above story is not word for word what Nia said – it’s more of an idea of the kinds of stories she will tell me during the day. It may seem awful but I don’t really remember the stories she actually does tell me because that would be nearly IMPOSSIBLE. I mean, she tells me like two or three a day and it’s usually while I’m trying to think about something else.)
Are You Zhazha? 
Say what?